Not Skeered

Nine months ago I gave birth to a tiny little boy. I think back to that day and I remember not feeling scared. I was in pain and I wanted that to stop, but I did not worry about Mr. Charlie.

Keep in mind that I was 8.5 weeks early. Marc was 45 minutes away at work and I didn’t know when or if he would get there in time. My mom and the rest of my family was 4 hours away. I was still not scared.

Back up to 2005…

Almost 8 years ago my nephew was born with a collapsed lung. My sister did not get to hold him before he was sent to a hospital in Columbia, MO – 2 hours away from her. The entire family was in tears while we said our goodbyes to Mr. Broc, except for me. I did not cry.

Because my sister could not be discharged until the following day, she immediately put on her Mommy hat and started figuring out who was going to go to Columbia and who was staying with her. My brother-in-law and his mom would go to Columbia to be with Mr. Broc. I saw the angst all over my sister’s face. She needed someone with a level head to get them there safely.

“I’ll drive,” I said. She knodded.

What?! Listen, I am the youngest of my family. I am sentimental. I worry.

Why in these two situations did I not let my worries take over my emotions? It’s not as if I am incapable of crying (ask my husband). It’s not as if I was not hoping for the best and preparing for the worse.

I think there is a muscle inside our guts that tells us when we can keep it together and when we can let it out. That piece inside of my gut is called Granny.

Meet Patsy, aka Granny. She is the strongest woman I know. And that’s a good thing because she has the mushiest most sentimental husband on the planet.

Granny Patsy

I’ve only seen tears fall from her eyes a few times. She is VERY caring and compassionate, don’t get me wrong. However, she can keep it together better than any man. I think I have Granny in my gut telling me to keep it together in crisis moments.

It also helps that I truly believe that God knows best, he will take care of us and his plan is supreme.

In case you are wondering…

Mr. Charlie is a healthy 9 month old little boy.

Mr. Charlie

Mr. Broc is doing well too.

Mr. Broc

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